The life lessons I learned from grade 5-6’s this year

Firsts are always magical.

They don’t always go to plan. For that matter, it’s hard to have a fully fleshed out plan. You’ve never done it before! But the experience is always memorable.

The first time I taught Coaching & Leadership at Western, there was nothing I wanted to do more. Nowhere else I would have rather been.

My first semester as a Residence Life Don? Nothing better. Nothing else I’d rather do. Some of the most impactful friendships of my entire life.

I think that’s part of the reason why this SPARK program has been one of the unequivocal highlights of my time with The Blue. This has been one of my all-time favourite firsts.

I created this leadership program for grade 5-6’s primarily as a recognition of the skills the students already had at their disposal. Why wait another two years to create a youth council (the age that they’re actually old enough to volunteer in our programs), when they’re already good enough right now?

The program was born out of a desire to build up the already existing skills of five incredible grade 5-6’s (soon seven of them). Over the 20 weeks, the progress was unbelievable. Most of them now have a harnessed skillset, level of awareness, and knowledge-base, that could rival our oldest volunteers. If they had the maturity, they would be ready to apply for staff positions. They’re that good.

They know how to speak to participants on an individual level. They know how to create high-quality activities. They even have a greater sense of how they can improve on their own personal development path. They don’t know how and when to stop talking. But neither do I. So they learned from the best.

But something more remarkable happened than I would have imagined. I love using conversations from my university class to inspire conversations in my programs. I love using discussions from my programs to inform teachings to my students. As you may have noticed, sometimes that cyclical process even extends into my written work. But they genuinely taught me more than I ever could have imagined.

They inspired this article about how to be the best leader that you can be: The #1 way to increase engagement in programs. Even better, this one about friendship.

Two biggest takeaways:

1. The #1 thing they said makes for a good leader? That the leader participates alongside them.

This always amplifies the fun. If the leader is their most enthusiastic, goofiest self, kids will feel comfortable being the same. And what kid doesn’t love to be goofy?

So why are so many leaders afraid of being silly? We can all have so much more fun if we create an environment entangled in enthusiasm and excitement. We can all have so much more fun if we actually play dodgeball with them, rather than watching from the side. It’s more fun for you as the leader. It’s WAY more fun for the kids. Trust me. Trust them.

2. When asked which things in their life absolutely had to stay and which could go, every single one of them said they wanted to keep their friends.

We don’t always make our closest friends a priority. Sometimes we let our very best friends – the very people that we care about most and that care about us the most – go. We let them leave our lives. Sometimes we spend every single day talking to someone about the good in life only to drop them the moment they need us to help them through the bad. Don’t let this happen. Take care of the people that care about you. Good things will come.

Over the twenty weeks, it’s valuable life lessons like this that I will take with me into every class I teach, every coaching session, and every program I lead.

Key reminders for myself:

1. When you see a need, strategically find ways to fill that need in creating something awesome.

2. Great ideas are not always born out of what makes sense! Don’t just go with the flow of what’s been done in the past. Sometimes it’s the option that’s never been done before that makes the most sense.

3. Lead with unrelenting enthusiasm even in your own personal lows. Your participants will always respond in the same way, making for an enjoyable experience for all.

When I look back at all the programs I’ve spearheaded over the years at The Blue, all of them, at a base level, share this commonality: Kids had fun.

But I didn’t always get the outcomes I wanted. Tried to teach grade 5-6 boys about toxic masculinity – didn’t really work. Tried to inspire a relatively unathletic group of participants to participate in innovative physical activity experiences in the outdoors – didn’t really work!

I got everything I wanted out of this program, and I will personally never forget the twenty weeks spent with them every Tuesday night. I know they won’t either. And I know they’re going to take their notebooks home with them and remember some of these key life lessons for years to come. As life naturally moves away from The Blue with time, I will too.